August 26, 2006

Oh, yeah me time! Is it bad to be happy about getting some alone time? Sometimes I think that I spend so much energy on others, that sometimes I donít have enough energy for myself. So with Chris working today and then heís visiting a friend after work., I get some major alone time. Iím on call this weekend so itís especially nice when itís quiet because it has not been quiet at all lately. In the past 3 months, I think I have hospitalized a lot of people. Itís a high number because about 3 years ago, I might get someone every other month or so. Last month during one weekend, I hospitalized 5 people. The crappy thing is that it takes me an hour to get up to the hospital so I might only be there for an hour but Iím in the car for 2 hours. Last night I was out until 2 am but then I started getting paged for crisis calls at 3:30 am, 5:30 am, so Iím running on drained battery. Iíve been taking it easy today. Did laundry, got on the net, and just relaxed. Days like this, I just want to sit home, talk to no one and relax. My office mate Heather says it has something to do with my ďChiĒ where Iím an introvert and I get drained by others. So Iím charging up my battery today. So far, itís been wonderful!

Iím still hovering around 170 pounds. So maintenance is good. Exercising is not going well and Iíve been totally slacking. Iím even letting my Curves ladies down, heck, Iím even letting myself down. Iím hoping after I get home from KY in September things can get back on track.

Iíve been a tad down lately. Last weekend I was so depressed that I was fighting with Chris just to fight with him. Luckily, I have a well grounded husband who refuses to fight with me so I didnít get myself in any trouble. This year just hasnít been my year so let me hit 31 quickly because 30 sucks. It feels like Iím really stuck too. I donít know how to explain it but itís been such an emotional year, Chris losing his job last year and then getting out of aviation, living on 1 income for 8 months and still being able to save and pay off, my sister basically exiting my life and not having a connections with my nephew, parent pressures where I was not seeing them as much as they wanted when they were up north, struggling with the thoughts of not wanting children one day yet wanting them, the commute to work, other work stressors, and being 30 and not owning a home yet making enough money to have one because we want to pay off the $16K (my jeep and Chrisís financial aid). Itís just not a fun time for me. Lots of little stuff piling up. I think that the house thing sparked me last weekend. Everyone I know is getting a house...everyone. Here Chris and I make a really decent income but we are not buying anything. Well, in a way, there isnít anything out there that is half way decent out there though. We looked at a house about a mile away from the rental house but it was a huge disappointment. On the net it looked gorgeous but when we walked through it, the bedrooms were way too small, and we donít want to settle into a starter home because of our ages. Besides, we donít even have a huge down payment. We just paid off his car back in May and that took about $8K out of our account, next we are working on his $9K financial aid which will be paid off November 1st, then my jeep will be paid off in February. So we are in super saving mode. Right now weíre able to save about $2K a month and when the debt is gone we will be able to save close to $3K so by December of 2007 we could possibly have over $36K in the bank. So I just need to be patient. If we wait, we could actually build in a subdivision and have a house built to our specifications. I just have to wait...and hope the lady that we are living in her house does not die...because that would suck to go back to the apartment. I just donít want to do that. Enough of that depressing crap...Itís just a phase, I know it...

We made it to DC and out east. It was a stressful vacation where I came back more tired than when I left. We had an incident with Enterprise that left us carless and wondering if we were going to make it back but it all worked out. I have to say that after this incident, I will never be without a credit card myself. Chrisís credit card company said that his account was comprimised so enterprise would not let us rent from them. We ended up going to Avis with the help of his aunt and then for the rental on the way home, his credit card company overnighted his new CC so we could rent a car on the way home. So that really stressed me out. We went to Philadephelia and it was one of the most horrible cities that I ever have been too. Sorry, donít mean to offend anyone out there but it was just was difficult to navigate, people were rude, and it was congested. I will never go back there...DC was terrific. We stayed with Chrisís cousin Lyman who lives in the historic district in a brownstone. We were 5 blocks from the Eastown Market and Subway so it was convenient to go into the city. We walked ourselves to death but it was nice. While I was in the city, I hooked up with a friend from graduate school. That is a picture of us up there. I learned that she had breast cancer last year. She is currently in remission...thank goodness to John Hopkins! It was great to see her so I guess I would consider seeing her the highlight of the vacation. Urban vacations are so much different than the outdoorsey vacations. Iíll take a back woods vacation anytime.

Iím hoping that the fall will be quiet, less stressful, and fun. Iím cutting back on oncall at work. I was doing a full weekend plus another weekend day in the month but Iím not going to be doing it anymore, weekends are too precious! Iíll keep on plugging and hopefully 31 will happen soon, only two more weeks left...thank God! Take care all-Kellie

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