by Walter J. Jones
Legal notice: All characters and places are the property of MTV Networks Inc, MTV Pocket
Books Inc. The following is intended as a homage to a great show on MTV and no legal
will be taken if ideas from this script are use in a Daria episode.
Special note: The following doesn't exactly follow the usual "Daria" formula of
shallowness. Instead, it follows more serious tones and emotions.
Middle February, as the leaves around the city of Lawndale have begun turning green
especially around Lawndale High as the school bell rings, signaling the end of another
school day and the beginning of a long holiday weekend for Daria Morgendorffer and her
friend, Jane Lane as they leave school as usual, and go in the direction of the pizza
for after school pizza.
Daria: So Jane, what did you think of Mr. Di Martino's class today, as if their was
think about on a Friday?
Jane: Scary, very scary! His bulging eyes are starting to remind me of your dad...
Daria: Tell me about it! Both of them are headed for a killer stress attack, if not a
and Upchuck was no help with his sexist drool! It almost got us double homework, and a
report over the weekend! Remind me to choke Upchuck on Tuesday
Jane: Hey Daria, speaking of strokes, as in a stroke of pure genius, I just remembered
Mystik Spiral's playing at McGrundy's Pub today! Want to, eh---- stop by? I know Trent
Daria:[deadpan] Oh I'm just sure he would! (snarls at Jane)[thinking] Why do I smell a
[speaks to Jane] And just HOW Miss Lane, do you suppose we gain entry inside McGrundy's?
You know how those idiots are about fake ID's.
Jane: You haven't heard? The city council took their liquor license, and now they sell
sodas, juice, and food! It was right after that accident out side of the place! The family
sued, got a
fat settlement, and that's when they took their license! So now, legally, we can get in!
Daria: So they finally got smart, not that it would help them any, but what happen to
Jane: Earth to Daria, have you been listening? They now have pizza there, and its far
the grease that awaits us at the pizza parlor, and less expensive too. Even their Shovel
Onion Rings are good. (Daria gives Jane a smug look) Well, that's what Trent told me!
Daria! It will be fun!
Daria: Jane you know I hate fun, but OK!(Jane and Daria change direction as they go)
EXT Pizza parlor, early afternoon with the Spice Girls blaring out of the outdoor speakers
Daria's younger sister (or "cousin," whichever story you believe,) Quinn and the
(Joey, Jeffy, Jamie) all in tow have already arrived at the pizza parlor and are snacking
pizza, paid for by the guys! (camera does CU on Quinn)
Quinn: So you see Joey, Jeffy, Jamie, you guys should never believe anything Daria says!
miserable liar, who just wants to be my sister, and ruin my life! She's really my cousin,
only child! We don't even look alike, my goodness!
Joey, Jeffy, Jamie, :[voices, in unison] Whoa! (camera pans to Joey)
Joey: I always knew there was something wrong with what she was saying! (camera pans to
Jeffy: Well hey, I knew first!(camera pans to Jamie)
Jamie: Well, I knew the longest! (camera pans to Quinn who now sports an evil smile!)
EXT MC Grundy's Pub, early afternoon, as Matchbox 20 plays from the outside speakers
INT --A surprisingly packed crowd filled McGrundy's for an afternoon. Most of the tables
were filled with mostly poseurs. Daria and Jane survey the crowd, walk in and find a table
Daria: Not half bad! Trent tells me this place is usual half-empty, like Quinn's
at Daria) Alright Jane, enough of the damn yenta act!
Jane: Gee Daria, I was smirking at your Quinn remark! [thinking] What's gotten into her?
Daria] Hey look! A table with two of the same kind of chairs, just waiting for us!
Daria: Oh I just BET, they are! (The two walk over to the table and sit down)[thinking]
to have set this up!
MS of Trent Lane, Daria's "love" interest, Jane's older brother and lead
vocalist of Mystik
Spiral. The band, which also features his long time friend, and Jane's "love"
Moreno on rhythm-guitar, were tuning up as Trent notices his sister and, of course Daria.
whispers something to Jesse who passes the message to the other members. Trent begins to
through the microphone.
Trent: Hey! Good afternoon, and welcome to the new McGrundy's! [wild applause] Is this a
crowd or what? [more wild applause] Anyway, We're Mystik Spiral and we want to kick it off
with the B-side to our current single, "Behind My Eyelids," and it's called
"Icebox Woman." And
I'm dedicated it to someone I consider a very special friend, and a very special young
her name is ----Daria Morgendorffer. (Trent and the band begin to play)
A two shot of Daria with a blank look on her face and Jane with a silly smirk on hers,
looking at Daria.
Jane: Gee, aren't we just special! (Daria's blank look turns to a dirty snarl at Jane)
Daria: [whispers to a near grunt] You know, you just can't stop playing yenta, can you, or
your damn goal in life, Jane Lane? [thinking] Yep! She set me up!
Jane: Ooooh! Feisty today, aren't we? Trent likes a feisty lady! (Daria gives Jane, the
death) [thinking] Mental note to myself! Do not to quote Upchuck anymore!
EXT Morgendorffer residence, late afternoon
INT Morgendorffer living room as Daria's mom, Helen is in an aerobic frenzy, as she is
doing upper arm routine to the music of The Bee Gees (Stayin' Alive). At about the same
time, Quinn walks in through the front door and begins to go upstairs
Quinn: Hi mom!
Helen: QUINN MORGENDORFFER! Don't you even think of going upstairs. You're in big
trouble, young lady! (Quinn freezes in fear. Helen stops her routine) I received a call
principal, Ms. Li at school today saying (Helen turns toward Quinn) that you have been
your friends that Daria is your "cousin!" (CU on Quinn in a look of fear)
EXT McGrundy's Pub
Daria and Jane leaving the pub. You can still hear Mystik Spiral play inside. Daria was
quite shaken by Trent's actions and upset with Jane for ribbing her about it. Daria is set
Jane: I don't know why you wanted to leave early! We didn't even get to eat, and Trent was
getting fired up, just for you! (Daria gives Jane another look of death) You know Daria,
been awful damn moody and quiet since--------
Daria: SHUT THE HELL UP, JANE! (Daria and Jane stop as Daria turns Jane) Once again,
Miss Lane, your trivial little ass set me up, but why should that surprise-----
Jane: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold the phones! If you're talking about the little dedication
did, I had no idea he was going to do that! I thought it was kinda cute myself! But, if
damn upset about it, why aren't you yelling at Trent? He's the guilty party, not moi! But
you would NEVER yell at Trent, because you're a love-sick puppy that's scared of him------
Daria: Bullcrap Jane! (points at Jane) Unadulterated, uncorrupted, bullcrap! Your trivial
ass knew damn well he was going to do that! That's why you dragged me there today! That's
I'm yelling at you, not Trent! You don't see me playing yenta with you and Jesse, do you?
no, I didn't think it was cute missy! Far the hell from it! So don't you dare stand there
and try to
thrust the guilt on to Trent to cover that trivial ass of yours! I wouldn't be a bit
shocked to find out
you put him up to it! You know I hate that! And don't pull that "I'm scared of
because it is just that--- GARBAGE! You're behaving worse than Quinn! And what's worse, is
that you're now comparing me to a domestic animal! Will wonders ever cease from you? I
not in this lifetime! If Trent wants to tell me his true feelings about me, he can do that
on his own,
he doesn't need you to meddle. And personally, I'm getting tired of your damn
because you're pushing the boundaries of our friendship, dammit! (Jane becomes angry)
Jane: Dammit yourself Daria! You know you've had it bad with Trent for months and you know
he has had it even worse for you! He wakes up at night, screaming your name-----
Daria: Another damn lie-----
Jane: And why is that a lie? Because you've known in your heart that you've wanted Trent
than anything in this world, even more than your own family! I don't have to put Trent up
anything! And if I did put him up to it, it's because I don't seem to know you anymore.
looks at Jane with disdain)
Daria: Well now, what's there to know, Jane? I don't like to be set-up to take a fall!
Jane: And that's another damn thing! You think everyone is trying to set you up! You've
acting really paranoid lately, as well as turned into an royal pain in the ass over Trent!
Friendship, what damn friendship? You take offense to ANYTHING I say amiss about you and
Trent, or just Trent in general! And when I do, you threaten me with bodily harm, if not
death. A real friend wouldn't do that, but you do! So don't you dare start any crap about
setting you up! (Daria tries not to cry as she turns away from Jane) Truth really hurts
doesn't it, Daria? (Daria violently turns toward Jane as Daria takes a swing, but stops,
to cry and runs away. Jane gasps at the horror of it all)
Daria running to a nearby tree, rests besides it, and cries as she collapses besides it.
Daria: [screams out] Oh god, what have I done! (she continues to cry as she continues to
collapse to the ground)
EXT Morgendorffer residence, late evening, with the sound of birds tweeting outside
LS of an irritated Quinn pacing back and forth through the living room.
Quinn: This is so unfair, Mom! My entire social life has been completely ruined!
Helen: [voice] Quinn, you think EVERYTHING is unfair, to you that is! (Helen walks into
picture) That is why YOU, young lady, are going to learn to love, recognize, and
sister, and if it means you staying home instead of going out, Quinn, so be it! (Quinn
Quinn: [whining, even more than usual] But Mom! No dates outside the house for two months?
Ooooooh! I might as well die, or whatever!
Helen: Quinn, Daria doesn't date outside the house that much. You don't see her brooding!
turns away from Helen)
Quinn: [mumbles] That's because she's a misery chick and can't get a date! (Helen smacks
smack] Quinn in the back of the head) OUCH!
Helen: I heard that, Quinn! You want to make it four months? And besides, you should of
of the end result of lying before you started those lies of yours about Daria, just
doesn't have your kind of shallow friends! Speaking of which, have you ever tried to be a
Quinn: And get myself kicked out of the Fashion Club? I'd rather eat mice, or whatever!
Helen: Is that all you think about Quinn, besides boys, is that damn Fashion Club? You
Quinn, sometimes, I'm ashamed to call you my daughter! (Quinn storms off) Ohhhh! What am I
going to do with that damn child? Speaking of Daria, she's running late! (A door is heard
Helen turns in the direction of it to find Daria entering, still an emotional wreck)
god, you've been crying! (Daria eyes begins to water again as she runs to Helen's shoulder
cries) It's OK, I'm here!
EXT Lane residence, almost dark
INT Jane's bedroom as Jane plays with her glue gun (from "Road Worrier"), but
seem to concentrate as she thinks about what went down earlier with Daria.
XCU of Jane thinking
Daria: [voice,echo effect] SHUT THE HELL UP, JANE! (Jane sighs, and sheds a tear)
CU of the door as Trent enters
Trent: Hey Janey, you guys left kinda early this afternoon, missed a great show! So, what
Daria think of-----
Two shot of Jane and Trent
Jane: SHUT UP TRENT! Thanks to you, you moron, I think I've lost Daria as a friend! She
took a swing at me today ! She's never done anything-----
XCU of Trent, with a look of concern on his face.
Trent: Whoa, whoa! Slow down Janey! You're giving me too much info at once! What are YOU
talking about, and why would that make Daria want to take a swing at you? [pause] Oh, I
you've been playing marriage broker, again! [now angry] Dammit Janey! We have talked about
that already! I could see why she would take a swing at you! I would too! You need to stop
playing Cupid with Daria! She can't be forced into things, neither can I!
CU of Jane, with a sad look on her face
Jane: Trent, I know you two better than I know myself! Don't you think I know that? Daria
set that whole thing up! [voice cracks] I had no idea you were going to do that.........
Two shot of Jane and Trent
Trent: Do what? That dedication this afternoon? (Trent walks towards Jane) You're right! I
didn't know you guys were going to stop by this afternoon, either! Aw, Christ! I am a
[sighs] I've really done it this time! Guess she won't be speaking to me either! (Trent
head down) What in the hell was I thinking-----
Jane: Don't say that, Trent! (Trent looks up) She truly loves you! You know she just
afraid to say
it thinking you might run off like some scalded dog! [voice begins to crack even more] I,
Lane, on the other hand, have blown it with Daria! (Jane sheds another tear as Trent
her hair) Trent, I said things to her today, I wouldn't say to a dog! The whole episode
so ugly! She's never going to speak to me again....(Jane starts to cry)
Trent: It's going to be alright, Janey! (Trent give Jane a hug as she continues to cry)
EXT Morgendorffer residence, dark
INT Morgendorffer dining room as the family is having, (take a good guess!) lasagna'
XCU of Daria attempting to eat, but is having the same trouble as Jane.
Jane: [voice, echo] Dammit yourself Daria! You know you've had it bad with Trent for
Helen: [voice] Daria, you're starting to worry me dear! (Daria is still deep in thought,
sheds a tear) Daria! (Daria snaps out of it)
Daria: Huh? Oh, I'm sorry! (Looks and sees and that Quinn and her dad, Jake have left the
table) Where are Dad and Quinn?
Two shot of Helen and Daria
Helen: You father went in the living room to read the paper and I sent Quinn to her room,
can talk, alone! Now I know you and your friend, Jennifer------
Daria: That's Jane!
Helen: I'm sorry! JANE, had an argument this afternoon, and you're hurting because of it,
can I help you if you won't open up to me? (Daria's eyes begin to water again, as she
XCU of Daria without glasses wiping away her tears
Daria: Mom! This mess goes a lot deeper than just Jane and I! It involves her brother,
well! (camera pulls out to a two shot of Helen and Daria)
Helen: Oh yes, you've told me about Trent and how much you like him, and I can see why!
looking young man, reminds me a lot of your father! You know Daria, none of the guys that
has dated even comes close! I wouldn't know how they really are anyway since she never
introduces us to them! For all I know, they're all probably perverts, that only want to
laid!(Daria attempts to surpress a smile and a slight chuckle through her tears, as she
glasses back on!) And I think you know it too, Daria, or else you wouldn't be trying to
that cute smile that you have! You know, I bet Trent would love to see that smile! And of
you think that if you tell him how you really feel, you'll lose him as a friend?
Daria: You know me all too well, Mom!
Helen: Moms are suppose to know their daughters too well! (Helen holds Daria's hand)
Daria: But Mom, what really hurts is that Jane continues to interfere, not letting us take
so we can tell each other how we feel!
Helen: I know how that can be! Take your Grandfather Barksdale! He didn't think at, first,
father was good enough for me, but we persevered! [smiles] What you need to do first and
foremost, is tell Trent how you really feel, and don't be afraid if he rejects you as
than a friend. But I'm sure he won't! And everything else including your friendship with
fall into back into place! (Daria smiles and is comforted by those words) I see someone's
Daria: Thanks Mom! I am feeling a little better! Going to finish my homework and call it a
night (Daria gets up and gives her mom a kiss on the cheek) I love you! Good night! (She
Helen: Good night, I love you too!
CU of Quinn in her room with the customary wireless phone in her ear
Quinn: I have to cancel my five dates with you, Brad! [pause] No Brad, I'm not seeing some
guy behind your back! You see, my crazy mom has kinda grounded me for awhile! [pause
Well, FINE! Be that way, since you don't believe me! (hangs up the phone) He wasn't worth
Quinn's POV shot of the doorway to her room as Daria solemnly walks by to go to her own
Quinn:[voice] Oooooh! And it's all Daria's fault, as always!
Helen:[voice] Quinn! Sounds like you really need to stay home more! Let's make that four
months! (The door slams)
EXT. Lane residence, late evening
INT. Jane's bed room as she watches, "Sick Sad World," alone
TV: [voice] COMING UP NEXT--------She's a high school honor student by day, but a
club-jock by night! Tonight's "Sick Sad World" Friday night prime-time special
-----(Jane turns off the TV)
Jane: What's the use, it's no fun watching this without Daria here! I really wish she was
now!(Jane sheds a tear)
EXT. Morgendorffer residence, later that evening as the phone rings
INT. Morgendorffer living room as Helen, who is working on the home computer, answers the
Helen: Hello? [pause] Ah Trent Lane, Daria and I were just in conversation about you at
dinner table, and here you are calling tonight! Well, Daria's already in bed-----[pause]
want to talk to me? [pause] About?
SPLIT-SCREEN SHOT between Helen in the Morgendorffer living room, and Trent in the
Trent: It's about what happened this afternoon with Daria and my sister! I'm really
both Daria and Janey, Mrs Morgendorffer!
Helen: I am too, and please call me Helen! Daria's usually very serene! She never even
a baby, but now, I just don't know what to do! I really think that damn prison they call a
school is partly to blame!
Trent: I know, my sister can be the same way! I haven't seen her this wrought-up in a long
would have to agree with you on Lawndale High!
Helen: Now Trent, I know Daria has feelings for you, and she's afraid to tell you those
feel, because she thinks you'll hate her for that! (Trent is shocked to hear Helen say
Trent: Funny you say that, I have that same fear about telling Daria!
Helen: Really? Does Daria know about this?
Trent: No, she doesn't! I would like to keep it that way, for right now! Your daughter is
special young lady to me, and I would like to have the honor to tell her myself!
Helen: Of course, I won't tell her a thing!
Trent: Thanks! [smiles] Well, as far as Daria and I go, Janey's interfering is not helping
much! I really need to talk to Daria soon!
Helen: Well then, in that case, can she come by, say, tomorrow?
Trent: Name the time!
Helen: Is Six PM a good time for you?
Trent: Six is fine! I'll see you then!
Helen: See you then, Bye-bye! (both hang up their phones)
EXT. Morgendorffer residence, day break the next day
INT. Morgendorffer dinning room as Daria is calmly eating dry toast, drinking hot herb tea
and reading the paper(camera pans over to her father Jake)
Jake: So Quinn, what are you plans for today, kiddo? (camera pans to Quinn who seems to be
a nasty mood, while eating just dry toast)
Quinn: Well Daddy, since Mom has got me trapped here--- (camera pans to Helen)
Helen: QUINN MORGENDORFFER! Don't you dare lay that guilt trip on me! You forget I'm a
trial lawyer! Besides, like I said yesterday, you brought this on yourself, kiddo! And
look to your father for any help! (camera pans back to a nervous Jake)
Jake: So Daria, eh, what's your plans for today, dear?(camera pans over to Daria)
Daria: I'm not quite sure Dad! With things as they are in the world of friendship, it's
Jane and I are going to do anything together soon!
Two shot of Helen and Daria
Helen: Well then, Daria, I could desperately use your assistance today. I need to pick a
outfit, for court on Monday!
XCU of a deadpan Daria
Daria:[thinking, cringing] Oh great, just what the hell I need! Another damn opportunity
Mom to try and bond with me! Stay calm Daria! It's only another shameless attempt to turn
you into Quinn! (camera pans to Helen)
Helen: And you're so good with color coordination, and how they make a statement, could
come to the mall with me?(camera pans back to Quinn)
Quinn: Daria? Color coordination? [giggles] That's a hoot! (Helen's hand, again, smacks
in the back of the head) [SXF:smack] Ouch!! (camera pans back to Helen)
Helen: Shall we try, six months Quinn? (camera pans back to Daria) As I was saying Daria,
could really use your help!
Daria: Well, why not, Mom? It will give me something to take my mind off of things!
WS, EXT of Cranberry Commons, the only shopping mall in Lawndale(thank goodness!)
INT of Cashman's department store ladies section as Helen steps out of the dressing room
in a different color pantsuit, and Daria is sitting on a cushion
Helen: What do you think Daria? Is this green outfit, too daring?
Daria: [scrutinizes for a few minutes] Well Mom, if I were the judge, your client would
CU of Helen, Daria's POV
EXT. Morgendorffer residence
INT. Morgendorffer living room as the Fashion Club (FC)is having its Saturday meeting. In
attendance, along with Quinn, who is the vice-president, is Sandi, the president of the
the secretary of the FC, Tiffany, and an unidentified blonde girl (no, its not, Kevin
steady, Brittany Taylor.)
CU of Sandi, as the meeting begins
Sandi: [deep, monotone voice] I call this meeting, like, to order! Our first order of
like, this matter of our vice-president, Quinn Morgendorffer, lying about her sister,
her cousin and her mom is like, making her feel like a common criminal! (camera pans to
who is seemly ashamed)
Quinn: Now Sandi, there is a reason why I did that! [spastic whining] If you had a sister
was ugly as sin, would you claim her as immediate family? [calms down]No, I don't think
Sandi, CU, who is smiling
Sandi: Well Quinn, I want to assure you that---------- we understand why you did that!
pans to Stacy, who is taking notes) And you're absolutely correct! Why would anyone claim
or anyone like her as anything? I mean she's like extremely dull, ugly, and has absolutely
friends whatsoever, except of course, that weird art school chick she hangs out with, her
musician brother and his friend! I mean, like someone should like lock them up for being
hideous(Stacy shocked to hear this and snarls at Sandi)
CU of Tiffany with a look of pure disdain
Tiffany: [deep, grinding voice] Sandi, hideous isn't the word to describe those four! That
be like a compliment to them! (everyone laughs but Stacy)
CU of a very relieved Quinn
Quinn: Then you realize completely what I have to live with, Sandi! (A notebook and pen is
thrown at Quinn as it hits her) What in the hell was that for Stacy?
CU of Sandi, looking at Stacy
Sandi: Yeah Stacy, like have you completely like lost it or is your hair like, braided too
(camera pans to Stacy, who is infuriated)
Stacy: Let's just consider that as my formal resignation from this shallow, pee-brain
never seen such wolf-pack insensitivity!(camera pans back to Sandi)
Sandi: Well Stacy, look who's talking about having a pee-brain! You can't even tell the
difference between stretch-pants and leggings! You also can't breathe without
(Everyone is laughing, but Stacy, whom the camera pans back to) Shall we go on or do you
feel disgraced enough?
Stacy: Well now, Sandi, that says a lot coming from such a foolish bitch who can't dance
her life and who worships a magazine! (Stacy comes face to face with Sandi)
Sandi: Watch it! You want to join Daria?
Stacy: Well, that may not be a bad idea ,since you have a very short memory, if any at
all, for if
you recall, (Sandi steps back) if you can, it was Daria who counseled and practically
you, (camera pans back to Sandi) when your inane cat, Fluffy, got into your make-up [Sandi
gasps] and swallowed it! (camera pans back to Stacy) And you Quinn, (camera pans to Quinn)
strike me as being so sick, as well as wretched by ignoring as well as deny having any
Gee, I wish I had a sister! (camera pans back to Stacy) Well, frankly Sandi, Tiffany, and
I'd rather wear combat boots, horn-rimmed glasses, and no make-up, than to hang around a
of freaking fashion flakes, thinking I'm so damn cool! (Stacy gets up, picks up her
pen, and leaves the meeting, leaving everyone, except Quinn, stunned)
CU of Quinn
Quinn: Sounds like a PMS problem to me! (She looks around) What?
EXT. Cashman's department store
INT. Cashman's ladies section as Helen pays for the green pantsuit, Daria walks over and
gander at some of the dresses for young ladies
XCU of Helen finishing her purchase when she notices Daria
XCU of Daria looking at a particular black crushed velvet dress
Helen: [voice] What's this? (Daria jerks around) Daria's actually looking at a nice dress
Daria: Well Mom, I was the fashion editor for the school paper back at Highland! You
those days? (Daria looks at the dress again) Nah, its just not me! (starts to put the
Well, at least I should try it on!
Similar shot from earlier as Daria is now walking out the dressing room, with the dress on
(and looking good in it!) Helen is now watching from the cushion.
Helen: [smiles] Why Daria, I've never seen you look more dazzling!
XCU of a happy Daria, Helen's POV
EXT Lane residence, late afternoon
INT. Lane living room as the door bell rings and Jane goes over to answer it. She opens
door to find Stacy, now wearing glasses and a "Daria style of dress"
Jane: Daria? (Stacy takes off her glasses to reveal herself) Stacy? What's this? Has the
Club made the Daria look popular, or is this some kind of joke?
Stacy: Not quite Jane! I quit the Fashion Club today! (Jane mouths a "WHAT?")
Just way, way,
too much to explain! May I come in?
Jane: Sure! (Stacy enters the Lane residence (CU on Jane) Jane doesn't know what to make
this latest event!)
CU of Trent in his bedroom, awake (for a change!) With the music booming, Trent looks to
be trying to write some songs
XCU of a sheet of paper, Trent's POV, with "Daria" written all over it
Return to previous CU as Trent balls up the paper
Trent: The only way is to tell her that I love her! But how to tell her is the problem!
EXT Cranberry Commons
INT Food court as Daria and Helen enjoy lunch (which looks almost like the normal
Morgendorffer family meal) after they get their dresses
Helen: [smiling] You know Daria! I'm having a great day! Shopping and having lunch with my
eldest daughter, who soon will be heading off to a fine university! [sighs] You know
feel like I've failed as a parent, with you and Quinn! (Helen sheds a tear) This damn law
profession has taken me away from raising you two! But some how, you seem to have raised
yourself! Quinn on the other hand, acts too damn silly for a high school girl! Yet, while
has taken to dating like wildfire, you seem to want to be more to yourself! I'm sometimes
quite sure why I tried to make you like Quinn! Instead, I should have made Quinn more like
Daria: As unexciting as I can be?
Helen: Now Daria, why do you put yourself down like you do dear? You are a joy to be
I think you don't hear that enough from me, and for that Daria, I apologize! (Daria smiles
Daria Thanks Mom! (Helen smiles, as Daria shed a tear) Why?
Helen: Why what Daria?
Daria: Why the extra attention?
Helen: You mean the attention that you have been lacking! You noticed this morning Quinn
smacked on the back of her head! (Daria nods her head) Well, she has been telling folks
guys were not sisters! I want her to hold her head up high, and be proud to be a sister to
if it means smacking her on the back of the head, so be it! [sighs] Daria, I've got one
Daria: You want me to apologize to Jane!
Helen: You knew what this was for didn't you? And you got a new dress out of it? I see the
Barksdale women's tradition lives on! (Helen and Daria both smile)
EXT. Morgendorffer residence, early evening
INT. Morgendorffer Living room as Jake, is watching "The Pigskin Channel," and
enjoying snacks, when the door bell rings.
Quinn: [loud voice] I'll get it, Daddy! (Quinn walks by Jake as he seems oblivious to
INT. Morgendorffer front door as Quinn answers the door to find Brittany Taylor, head
cheerleader for the Lawndale Lions wearing, her cheerleading outfit, who has in tow, Kevin
Thompson, Brittany's steady and the quarterback of the Lions, wearing his football gear,
who is almost as oblivious as Jake. Brittany appears to be angry.
Brittany: You, you, you, air-brained, red-headed, flirtatious, Morgendorffer temptress!
you dare lie to me, Quinn! It's all over school that you're trying steal Kevin away from
Quinn: Now Brittany, don't be silly! Why would I want to even date, Kevin? I only date
attractive, popular guys!
Kevin: Hi Quinn! (Brittany smacks Kevin on top of the head) But babe!
Brittany: Don't lie to me Kevin! [to Quinn] And how you dare you call my Kevin dumb ugly
unpopular, you, you, you, underclassman! That's probably why Daria hates you so much! Good
bye! (Brittany leaves in a huff, taking Kevin with her as Kevin is looking back at Quinn)
Quinn: That girl is weird!
CU of Helen and Daria on the open road as they pull into the Lane driveway
Helen: Good luck, Daria! (Helen gives Daria a hug as Daria leaves the car and goes over to
OH shot, Trent's POV from a window as Daria comes up to the house
LS Trent's room as he goes away from the window and trips over a footlocker (is he nervous
CU of Daria going to the door with an uneasy feeling. She sees an undraped window ,
which shows Jane and Stacy sitting down and talking
Daria: Well now! She didn't waste any time finding a new friend! (She sheds a tear, and
CU of Daria walking back home, sadly.
Trent:[voice] Daria! Wait up! (Daria stops, as Trent catches up. She turns towards him.)
Where are you going?
Daria: Home. It's very apparent that Jane doesn't want me as a friend!
Trent: Come on now Daria, you know she does, and you know how much of a smart ass she can
Daria: It doesn't look that way to me!
Trent: Oh, you mean that girl, Stacy? I over heard a little of their conversation. She had
the fashion club and was actually looking for some non-fashion advice from you and Janey!
XCU of Daria
Daria: Well Trent, there's still the matter of Jane interfering..........
XCU of Trent
Trent: You're talking about yesterday at the Pub? That was all my doing! I assure you that
had nothing to do with that! I didn't even know you guys were coming by, and I'm sorry
what I said!
Two shot of Daria and Trent
Daria: Hey, don't worry about it! I said some things that I should have never said! (Trent
Daria both look down, then look up at each other) You know Trent, we've been avoiding this
far too long, let's just cut to the chase! Ever since I first met you, I kinda had a thing
for you, but I
let things get in the way of it, make excuses, thinking, "I'm too smart to fall in
love!" Well Trent
Lane, I'm here today to tell you that I do love you! (Trent smiles and immediately kisses
Trent: Daria, you don't know how good that feels to hear you say that, and to get that out
way! Now, do you want to apologize to Jane? (Daria reaches her hand to Trent and they walk
away hand -in-hand!)
INT Lane living room where Jane and Stacy are sitting down on the sofa
Jane: You don't know the beginning of how you freaked me out, when you came over dressed
Daria! You two could be twins!
Stacy: Wow! I didn't think anyone outside of Daria could pull that off!
Jane: You said it girlfriend! (They give each other a high-five, as the door is heard
turn towards it) Well, speak of the devil! Look who Trent found! (camera pans to the door
Daria and Trent are in front of it, holding hands) And they're holding hands!
Trent: Well Janey, we finally told each other how we feel, without any prompting! (He
Daria and smiles, as he lets go of her hand)
Daria: Jane, can you forgive me for being so stubborn?
CU of Jane getting up from the sofa
Jane: Only if you can forgive me for being a brat and a royal pain!
Stacy: Oh will you two guys forgive each other already! (Jane goes over to Daria (camera
follow) as they embrace!)
Jane: God I missed you, Daria!
Daria: I missed you too, Jane!
EXT. Morgendorffer residence, the next day!
INT The Morgendorffer kitchen as Daria is helping Helen actually prepare a real meal in
anticipation of Trent coming over for dinner before he and Daria head off to the movies.
Daria chops up lettuce for a salad, Helen is removing a roasted chicken from the stove.
Helen: You know I'm kinda looking forward to not having a meal that came from a microwave!
(Helen, after placing the chicken on the counter goes over to Daria, looks at her and
her hair) I'm so glad you invited Trent over for dinner! It gives us all a chance to know
Daria: Thanks Mom! [smiles]
Helen: Daria, don't you want to get dressed? I'll finish up the salad!
Daria: No need Mom! Salad is done! (Quinn walks by wearing that ridiculous baby tee-shirt
that she wears)
Helen: Quinn Morgendorffer, I want you out of that ridiculous baby tee-shirt, and into
nice! We're having company tonight!
Quinn: [voice] OK Mom! (Helen and Daria are surprised by that response)
LS Quinn' s Room a little bit later as she has picked out a white textured dress to wear
Daria enters wearing the black crushed velvet dress. Quinn sees Daria
Quinn: Wow! You look great for a change.
Daria: As opposed to what I usually look like?
Quinn: Oh Daria, You are so funny! What did you need?
Daria: Actually I was wondering, could I borrow some (looks around) some lipstick?
Quinn: Of course! You can go ahead and keep it! (goes to her dresser and gives Daria the
lipstick case) So Daria, what's the big occasion that Mom is squaking about?
Daria: Jane's brother, Trent is coming over for dinner, then the two of us are going to
Quinn: Ooooh! A date! Need any advice?
Daria: Eh, nah! I don't think its going to get that involved! [doorbell rings] (Daria
nervous, starts to behave like Quinn) Omigod! Its Trent! (runs to the mirror) How do I
Quinn: Daria, relax! You look fantastic! (Daria calms down) Just be yourself! [both Quinn
Daria smile] (Daria walks away from the mirror)
Daria: Thanks Quinn!
Quinn: Don't mention it!
MLS of the door as Jake opens the door, Trent appears dressed in a suit, his goatee is
shaved and his hair combed!
Jake: You must be Trent! I'm Daria's father. but you can call me Jake! Come on in! Daria
down shortly! (Jake walks away from the door as Trent comes in)
LS of the living room as Trent and Jake take a seat on the sofa
Jake: Daria tells me you're in a band!
Trent: Yes sir! It's called Mystik Spiral!
Jake: Mystik Spiral, huh! Sound like a Doors cover band!
Trent: Strange! That's the very thing Daria said when my sister Janey first introduced me
Jake You're not offended by that, are you?
Trent: Oh no sir! We play alot of Doors covers at the Pub!
Daria: [voice] Hello Trent! (they both turn towards the stairs(camera pans over) at Daria
is smiling) Dinner is almost ready (she walks away towards the kitchen)
EXT Morgendorffer home late evening
CU of the front door of the house as Trent and Daria have returned (soft music plays ,
"How Deep Is Your Love," by the Bee Gees) as they share a deep, yet passionate
Daria: Trent, this is the best night of my life!
Trent: Mine too Daria! (They share another kiss)
XCU of Helen and Jake looking out the window. They turn, look at each other, and smile
knowing that Daria is truly in love.
ROLL CLOSING CREDITS