Daria + Kyle - Trent = Kaboom!!!
This story takes place right after Janes addiction. Its is written in
episode like format right now but rest assured I will eventually write it in regular form.
Oh yeah Daria and all related characters are property of MTV and do not belong to me and
yadda, yadda. So without further adieu. Daria + Kyle - Trent = Kaboom!!!
(Episode starts the with the usual theme song and then goes to Daria, and Jane sitting
in the living room ofthe Lane house. They are eating pizza from the pizza king. The box is
on the coffee table.)
Jane: So why do they call it a coffee table when I have never seen anyone drinking
coffee on it?
Daria: Um Jane whos they?
Jane: I dont know... oh now I do! The guy who invented the coffee table!
Daria: Jane that was one per- never mind. So whats on the old fun agenda this
Jane: Well me and Tom are going to see Notting Hill. He said that you and Trent should
go too. (Gets an
evil smirk on her face.)
Daria: Jane is this Trent thing going to be an obsession of you and Tom for the rest of
Jane: No. Just until we find someone else who appreciates our efforts to hook them up
with their one true
love... thats all.
Daria: Good. (They pause.)
Jane: Lets see whats on Sick Sad World. (They turn on the TV and go to
Daria: I see that the living room TV has finally been fixed.
Jane: Yeah, to my surprise Trent fixed it. Of course we were without power for about a
Daria: Are you sure that wasnt just you or Trent forgetting to pay the bill?
Jane: Maybe. I cant remember.
Sick Sad World announcer: She met someone else, he did too. But the only problem, his
girl was a gorilla
animal magnetism next on Sick Sad World.
Jan: Damn, reruns. (Suddenly a chord shakes the whole house. The TV shows static and
the lights flicker.)
Stupid band rehearsals. Im going to yell at Trent again. He has to stop turning that
damn amp up like that!
This is so annoying, my lights have been screwed up for the past week! (They get up and go
Trent and the band are playing Mr. Normal (it was you). They stop.)
Max: Nick! How many times do I have to tell you. I have the perfect rhythm! Youre
the one whos
slowing the whole damn song down!!!
Nick: Oh sure blame it all on me! I mean its not like you ever put your own
drumming in on a song!!
Trent: Hes right man.
Nick, and Max simultaneously: Stay out of this!
Trent: Lets take a break.
Jesse: Cool. (They relax putting down their instruments.)
Trent: Hey Janey, Daria.
Jane: Yo Trent. Do you think you and the Barney brigade can head over to Jesses
to practice? Your
starting to peel the paint off the walls upstairs. And you broke the TV again.
Trent: Sorry Janey, we got a big gig coming up we cant carry all this stuff to
Jesses. So until our gig well
be taking paint off all the walls. Hey Paint peeling that would be a cool song
Jane: Oh god! That gig isnt for a week!
Trent: Sorry, cant help you
Trent: (putting his hand up to silence her) Sorry little sister. cant do it. Okay
guys lets get cracking. (They
go back to playing.)
Jane: I just keep telling myself this is just a bad dream
Daria: well too bad that isnt true ( Another chord shakes the house. Jane and
Daria wince. Scene cuts to
the Morgendorffer house. Jake is snoring in front of the TV. Helen is walking around
picking up her brief
case, putting her earrings on, etc. Daria walks in. She sits on the floor and turns the
channel to Sick Sad
SSW announcer: He had several bionic limbs installed but now he uses all of them to
cheat on his girlfriend
the busy body now on Sick Sad World. (doorbell rings. And Daria answers it. Its Jane
Daria: Thank god. (commercial break.)
(Back to the fun he-he)
Tom: We were going to a party at my friend Kyles house. You wanna go? The
bands playing there.
Daria: That was the big gig? A party?
Jane: Hey give the band a break. To them playing at the airport while people are
waiting for their planes is a
big gig. This is their moment...
Tom: Yeah and theres about a hundred people there. Come on.
Daria: Hold on let me ask my mom. (she walks into the kitchen and sees Helen.) Hey mom
can I go to-
(she is cut off)
Helen: yes Daria be home by eleven! Ive got a big meeting out of town. Im
leaving now. Eric, and I are
Daria: Okay have fun mom. (She leaves. To herself) that was almost too easy. (They get
into Toms new
car and go to the party. They go inside. Mystik Spiral is playing From the
Futon. They take a five minute
break. Trent and Nick walk up.)
Nick: Hi guys. Is it mine or Maxs fault the song got screwed up?
Daria: Neither the song was bad to begin with...
Trent: Hey I wrote that song!
Jane: Sorry Trent. You know how right before you pass out when your really drunk you
decide to be Mr.
Honest, well Darias that way all the time
Trent: Oh okay... whatever. Im going to get a wine cooler. You want one Daria?
Daria: Sure. (they head over to the cooler. Trent picks up a wild berry, and strawberry
kiwi wine coolers.
Her hands the wild berry to Daria. She pops the top off and sips it.)
Trent: So, um cool party huh?
Daria: yeah if you like 98 drunk people hitting on you thinking youre the
Trent: (does his laugh/cough thing.) yeah five guys have hit on me tonight already,
Well I gotta get back...
Daria: Sure(He leaves. The band starts up again. Daria goes over and stands with Jane
and Tom. They are
holding hands and Daria looks forlorn well as sad as Daria can look without looking
pathetic. The Band
starts to play a slow song and she looks ready to cry. Out of no where a guy with a bottle
of water bumps
into her. He spills a little on her jacket.)
Guy: Im really sorry.
Daria: Thats okay. (She brushes herself off. Tom walks up with Jane at his side.)
Tom: Hey Kyle.
Kyle: Hi man, whats up?
Tom: Kyle this girl you spilled water on is Daria this is Jane, my girlfriend.
Daria: Hi Kyle.
Kyle: So Daria... um you like the band I hired?
Daria: Sure well as, long as they dont play music their okay
Kyle: (smiles) So, Daria. (this is clearly awkward. So Ill type what Kyle looks
like. Hes tall, has dirty
blonde hair, and bluish eyes. He is wearing a GAP T- Shirt, and a pair of baggy dark blue
His hair is cut mushroom style and he is pretty good looking.) Um you wanna dance?
Daria: Sure. (The two head out to the middle of the living room. And Kyle wraps his
arms around her waist
and her arms are around his neck. The two are dancing pretty close. Cue to Trent. He looks
over and sees
the two dancing. He suddenly looks very hurt. But he quickly hides it and continues to
sing. The song ends.
Cue to later. Trent and the band are talking when suddenly the radio begins to play the
song, All I have to
give By the Backstreet Boys comes on. Trent looks over at Daria and Jane, with Kyle
and Tom. Jane and
Tom are holding hands naturally and Kyle and Daria are sitting next to one another, they
are talking and
Daria is smiling.)
Trent: (VO thought) Ive never seen her smile like that, Oh no!!! Ive lost
her for good! (He suddenly looks
sad. He looks down and turns away. Cue to later. Toms car has broken down and Trent
is stuck with
riding Jesse, Max, Nick, Tom, Jane, and Daria home. Jesse is shotgun, and the others are
cramped in the
back. Nick and Daria are crushed side by side and they are looking in opposite directions.
Then Max is
sitting with his arms crossed trying to stay awake. Then Tom and Jane are side by side.
They are cuddled
together. Trent drops Jesse, Max, Nick and Tom off. Daria is shotty and Jane is asleep in
Trent: (coldly) I see you met Kyle...
Daria: (not catching it because it is so veiled) Yeah. (She smiles) Hes a pretty
Trent: (Pulls up to Darias house. Even colder than before.) Se ya Daria. (she
Daria(before she slams the door. The music plays at the part where they sing. but my
love is all I have to
give. Without you, I dont think I can live. I wish I could give the world to you,
but love is all I have to
give!) Well Trent see ya. (she walks to her door. The tank pulls away.)
Jane: (She sits up. She has picked up all of Trents iciness) Well Trent you had
the warmth of a snow pea
back there... so whats up with you?
Trent: None of your business Janey. Leave me alone! (Jane backs off. Her eyes wide with
Trents sudden anger. Commercial break. La, la, LA, la, la. La, la, LA, la, la. Back
from the commercial
break. At the Lane house. Trent is in his basement room. He is listening to a CD by
Backstreet Boys. (I
know, I know Im obsessed with them. Thanks to Ellie for introducing me to the
band!!!) The song is Id
go anywhere for you)
Trent: I dont know how they have so many admirers! But that song does remind me
of Daria a little. Oh
stop Trent! Shes seventeen for Gods sake!
Your twenty two. Kyle is only twenty. Daria would logically date someone close to her
age! And shed
never go with you anyway. Kyle is better looking. Why would she even look at you? (He
pauses) God I
have to stop talking to myself like that. Oh shut up! (Cue to Darias room.
Titanics My heart will go on,' is
playing on the radio. She is writing a poem in a notebook.)
Daria: (VO thought as she writes) Torn between to loves, I dont know what I must
do, my heart tells me
to choose, but which love is really true? Somehow I know that Trent is right for me, but
then there Kyle the
sweetest guy, this is my silent misery, decisions must be made now, hearts must be broken,
my heart will be
one of their sweet love tokens (VO stops as Quinn barges into the room.)
Quinn: Hey Daria do you think that black and gray go okay together or should I just of
the old classic black
Daria: Could you please knock next time? But I think black and white its very
simple. Hey Just like your
brain (Quinn goes hmph! And leaves. That night The band, Tom, Jane, Daria and Kyle decide
to go to a
club. Kyle and Daria have been going out for about two weeks. They are very close. They
stand side by
side and hold hands. Trent keeps giving Kyle deadly looks. Then he goes back to looking
Suddenly the song, Where can my baby be? The remake of the 50s song by
Pearl Jam comes on.)
Kyle: (Takes Darias hand.) Wanna dance? (the two go out and dance close. Trent
looks at them and
looks so dejected and angry and hurt all at the same time, he almost starts crying. He
goes to the bar and
drinks about three shots to get rid of the pain and emptiness inside him. Commercial
break. Slow motion of
Trent looking very hurt dejected and angry. End commercial break. Daria and Kyle are in
They are sitting on the bed talking.)
Daria: (getting up.) Ill get us some sodas, be right back. (She leaves. Then Kyle
looks around. He sees her
journal on the floor its open. He picks it up and begins to read. He turns to the
first few pages)
Kyle: (reading aloud softly) I think that Im in love, with Trent. I know it
sounds crazy but I think I am my
heart races every time I see him and when he says my name it feels like a knife cutting
through me I dont
know why but it does its crazy and it feels like a roller coaster but the good kind
of sick you get from
riding it (He hears Daria coming quickly replaces the journal.)
Daria: (Handing him the coke.) Wanna watch Sick Sad World? (cue to the Lane residence.
Trent is in his
room. He strums his guitar, and tries to think of words to a song.) How do I tell you,
what Im feeling now?
How Im feeling rejected and low and hurt and kicked around. My heart is like an open
wound. And it
clearly reads Tea leaves of its own doom! Oh Daria, Daria.... (Jane is passing by.
She stops in front of his
Jane: Hey Trent.
Trent: (abruptly stops singing) Hi Janey um did you want anything?
Jane: Couldnt help overhearing your little song. Your jealous arent you?
Trent: No way! Well maybe... yes! I am Jane! I dont know what to do (Cue to later
Daria rings the
doorbell. Trent answers. His hair is all wet, and its apparent that he has just
taken a shower.
Trent: Hey Daria. Whats up?
Daria: Have you seen Kyle around?
Trent: No why?
Daria: Well we had a fight the other day and Ive been looking for him But if you
havent seen him, Ill see
ya. (Begins to walk away.)
Trent: (realizing his chance) Um Daria.
Daria: (Turning back around.) Yeah?
Trent: If you find Kyle and he breaks your heart Ill be right there to pick up
Daria: Thanks Trent, youre a really great friend. (walks away.)
Trent (closing the door): Yeah but being a great friend doesnt get you to go out
with me. (cue to later.
Kyle is at the park alone. He is sitting on the swings. Daria approaches)
Daria: Why were you mad at me yesterday?
Kyle: Look Daria Im not gonna lie to you... (at this point Speechless
by Hanson plays very softly in the
background.) I read your diary. I know how you feel about Trent
Daria: Wait a minute you looked through my stuff?!
Kyle: it was sitting on the floor. Im sorry but I cant go out with a girl
who is fantasizing about someone
else while their with me I guess what Im saying is we should break up. (Song stops.)
Daria: Oh you know what fine. I cant believe you violated my privacy! You read my
Kyle: Well I cant believe that your in love with a guy who has no idea what the
word relationship means!
Daria: what are you talking about?
Kyle: Dont be an idiot Daria! Do you know how many women Trent has probably slept
Daria: I dont even wanna hear this!
Kyle: Fine! See ya around. (Gets up and storms off. Song I drive myself
crazy by NSync lays. Cue to
Daria laying in bed. Her eyes are red and puffy. She rolls over. Cue to Trent. Hes
awake too. Cue to next
morning. Daria miserably rings the Lanes doorbell. Trent answers.)
Trent: hi Daria. (he notices she is miserable.) What happened?
Daria: Kyle broke up with me (starts crying again. Trent invites her in and then he
turns on the radio, and
pulls out two cups for coffee. On the radio Ill never break your heart
by Backstreet Boys plays. Trent
sits down next to Daria.)
Daria: I dont know what the hell happened. I thought I could trust him
Trent: Daria, (she looks at him. He begins to sing softly.) Ill never break your
heart. Ill never make you
cry, Id rather die than live with out, you Ill give you all of me honey
thats no lie. (they kiss and episode
ends. Song continues. And alter egos. Daria as a popular person, Trent as a vampire, Jane
as a paintbrush,
Jodie as Toni Braxton, Mack as a Pikachu, Kevin as a football being kicked, Brittany as an
with a rolling pin, Quinn as a freak, and Kyle as a mangles painting.
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