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Are You A Saks Fifth Avenue Punk?

(Outraged enough? Read on)

You know what I really can't tolerate? Saks Fifth Avenue doing anything associated with punk! Yeah that's right. I can't stand it when super skinny super models are wearing plaid skirts with tons of zippers and combat boots by Tommy Hilfiger to represent the new 'high-tech punk,' whatever that is. I can't stand stupid fashion magazines always referring back to the Sex Pistols just because something called Vivienne Westwood back in the day ran a shop dedicated to the most commercial punk bands around. I can't stand all this corporate shit that can never go beyond icons. I can't stand punk getting mixed up with fashion magazines in the first place. How hypocritical! You know what else I can't stand? The way all these names like the Ramones and New York Dolls are always tossed around and subordinated to its safety region known as the Sex Pistols. I can't stand seeing Joan Jett posing in a $1,295 leather motorcycle jacket by Calvin Klein in New York Times Magazine and writers trying to convince me that Joan Jett is so cool! It just so happens I can't really believe she's so 'cool' when she's on the New York Times Magazine. I overall just can't stand Sex Pistols! I can't stand these corporate idiots always getting things mixed up. I can't stand Vogue Magazine putting 'P is for Punk: Don't you want to look like Sid Vicious with our $500 sterling silver safety pins?' I really can't stand clothes deliberately tattered and put on the market as punk wear by Daryl K. I have some tips. Wear your clothes longer than a season and maybe they will rip naturally and you won't have to pay extra for a 'vintage tear.' Hey that's even more punk, that's totally DIY! I have questions too. When do you ever see punks set out to shop in Saks Fifth Avenue for the most expensive and punkest clothes around? When do you really see punks basing their entire wardrobe on the Sex Pistols unless they're entirely morons? When was punk so fashionable to anyone outside its circle? Why is it always a bunch of over done seventies rock stars like David Bowie that are said to have the biggest influence on today's 'punk' kids? When was punk ever received so well by a bunch of high maintenance yuppies with expensive taste?

-STUPOR

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