The stage is dark. A shadow hits on Noze whose sitting in the corner of the attic drenched with
sweat. His sweat is dribbling down his forehead. His face looks as if he was going hysterical
almost looking insane he keeps repeating.
This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn't happening.
(Then a voice interrupts him.)
Kim: Are you ok? Say something Noze. (With a serious look on her face.
Noze doesn't say anything but just looks at her blankly.)
I never noticed this but there's my sister's initial carved here. (She reads the
carving on the side of the fire place.) Tatiana loves Grigori.
Noze: Just shut up Kim! You know you really annoy me. (Shrugging her
Kim: You have to put up with it now. We have been here cramped up in
this damn attic for half a day! (Louder.)
Noze: I'm going to try to break the wall or something. (He looks frustrated.)
Kim: We have to find some way to get out of here! Do you think they can
Noze: I doubt it. They're not that smart. But I think they can! Ok, Kim, this is
what I am going to do, I'm going to try to trick them when they come in?
Kim: I wonder what those two are doing I bet they are...
Noze: Don't even say it.
Kim: I guess she's not your girlfriend anymore!
Noze: She still is! (Angrily)
Kim: Only in your mind. (Confidently)
Noze: Shut up!
Kim: She has no right to take over my house! We should have ran but
instead you decided to fight!
Noze: No it was all your dad's fault to bring his cuckoo brother here!
Kim: But, how can he do that.
Noze: You annoy me!
Kim: Shut up!
Noze: Get out of my face! You know I'm really mad because I'm trapped in
here with you. I bet it's better being trapped with your sister.
Suddenly the door opens. O.B. comes in carrying a gun. There is the crazy Uncle Yuri
Uncle Yuri: Now. Don't even think of escaping, don't even try it, don't even
imagine it, because it will be useless! (pauses) It will be, I guarantee. (O.B. is laughing in
the back.) If you try to escape we have plan B all ready for you!" (He was all business.)
(Noze is in shock as he looks at his girlfriend O.B..)
Noze: You get me out of here! (Yells directly at the Uncle Yuri and O.B.) I
cannot be with her aright! I'm allergic to her please get me out of here! O.B., I thought
you were my girlfriend! Tell me he has brainwashed you! O.B.! (In a matter of seconds
Noze punches the Uncle Yuri. It's not a hard blow. The Uncle Yuri falls on his nose.)
O.B.: (In a raspy voice) Noze you stupid Boyeee. You thought we had
something. Oh, ho, ho, ho. (laughing) You are going to stay in here with Kim, too bad
Noze: O.B.! (The Uncle Yuri gets up and holds a gun to Noze's head)
Uncle Yuri: Ha, Ha, Ha!
O.B.: Noze you stupid boyeee! I'm going to hit you!
Kim: O.B. you psycho! Leave us alone!
(O.B. comes out of the room. Then a robot that resembles the Uncle Yuri and O.B.
takes Noze and Kim to a different room. The stage darkens.)
The light hits on Noze whose lying down. Kim comes over looking concerned.
Kim: Noze are you ok? (Low voice, then silence. Kim walks to the different
side of the room. The stage darkens.)
It's about 5 A.M. in the morning.
Noze: Kim, wake up. (There's a scarlet scar on his face. Kim wakes up
slowly.) They're coming. I hear them. (In a whisper) I'm so sick of you. (Looking at Kim
straight in the face.)
Kim: Then why don't you get out of here? (Defensively) If you can! (Noze
picks up a folder on the floor and flings it toward Kim.) Stop! (Kim is standing on the
wooden floor.) Noze you stupid idiot! (aggressively, she takes a swing toward Noze's
face where the vermilion scar is located. Noze grips his face in pain)
Noze: (low voice) That's where it really hurts. (Groans) Aghh.
Kim: I'm going to get out of here. If you want to get out of here help me!
Noze: Fine! (sarcastically)
(Noze climbs the old fireplace that reaches to the top of the roof.)
Kim: Is the chimney blocked?
Noze: Why don't you stand on my shoulder and you can look inside . (Kim
is standing on Noze's shoulder. The ashes of the chimney falls on Kim and Noze.)
Kim: I see the light. I see a ray of light. (excited)
Noze: You think you can go up? (hopefully)
Kim: I see more now. I think if you push me up. I can go up. (Holding Kim
up, Noze wobbles a little. Kim manages to go up. She rests her arms on the top of the
Noze: Can you go up. (eagerly)
Kim: Ahhh (a big scream) Put me down Noze. I see O.B. and Uncle Yuri!
They're on the roof. Oh my god!
Uncle Yuri: So you think you can escape. Ha, (pauses) Ha, Ha, Ha! We
got robots! Idiots!
(There are replicas of robots that looks like the Uncle Yuri.)
O.B.: Ya, Ya, Yee, Ya yee (a shrieky laugh) You thought you were going to
escape ho, ho, ho, ohh, ooh, ooh. You can't escape Noze you stupid boyee. Ha, Ha,
Ha, Kimbo, bimbo, you think you can trick me O.B. Alen. Noof. (She waves her arm in
an exaggerated way. The robots are running around the top of the roof and laughing
like O.B.. Noze pulls Kim down.)
Noze: Damn it!
(Kim sits down in the corner with her head down.)
Kim and Noze are led into a different room. This is the room where Kim's sister Tatiana and
her boyfriend Grigori were trapped in.
Tatiana: Oh Kim. What have they done to you?
O.B.: I will know what you're talking about girlowoo. Yeah. Ho,ho.
Noze: Shut up O.B..
O.B.: Remember Noze. The blow to your face. You wanted it. I don't
theenk so.... Yeah heee!
(The Uncle Yuri pushes Kim and Noze into the room. Grigori is sitting down on the
floor. The Uncle Yuri and O.B. disappears into the curtains.)
Kim: I'm so hungry.
Tatiana: I have some bread crumbs. You want it. (Kim takes some bread
Noze: Can I have some?
(A squeaky voice is heard from a speaker that's attached on the wall. It's O.B..)
O.B.: You can't have any food. It's your punishment for trying to escape.
Noze: Stupid, stupid, stupid. I had enough of this. I'm going to get out of
here! You can't do this! (Noze is swinging his arms and is punching the walls. Grigori is
just looking at Noze like nothing is happening.)
Kim: Sit down Noze.
Grigori: Sit down Noze you pathetic loser. Now what can we do to survive
those lunatics up there.
Tatiana: You're so smart Grigori!
(Noze covers his head and sits down.)
Kim: Are you ok Noze? (She looks concerned.)
Noze: Don't talk to me. (his voice echoes)
The stage darkens.
Kim and Noze are back in the attic.
(A spot light hits on Kim.)
Kim: I wonder what their real motives are. I use to have the most
predictable life in this world... going to a local college. Two months ago I met the most
exciting person in my life. You know him. Alex, simple minded, unidealistic. I don't even
know why I married him. Well it's not really what you think. It's much more simple. Well
anyway. We were going out but there certainly were problems. Somehow we got
married but he had married of course. I knew that before I married Alex. After few days
I got extremely jealous of the other girl. I was so mad! Then Steve my ex-boyfriend
convinced me to runaway with him. When I finally returned home. This is what
happened. Noze, you mysterious character now spill your story.
Noze: Not much to say. It's a long story.
Kim: If only we could look into the future. Noze, I wonder where others
Noze: Kim. (Noze looks at Kim and just out of the moment he kisses her.
They kiss. )
(O.B. is sitting on the kitchen table legs crossed. She is watching the TV screen.
The Uncle Yuri stand in the corner.)
O.B.: Yeahee, I'm so excited. Did you see it?
Uncle Yuri: Yep, and not an ordinary one, either.
O.B.: (laughing) Ho oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ho ho ho ho ho...
Uncle Yuri: It's what you wanted, O.B..
O.B.: Of course they kissed. (laughing) It was so funny.
Uncle Yuri: We gotta do something before anybody becomes suspicious.
(The light fades and the stage becomes dark. The door opens in the attic. It's
Uncle Yuri and O.B.. They take Kim and Noze down the basement. Grigori and Tatiana
are also in the basement.)
Noze: Damn it! (frustrated and standing.)
Kim: Nothing seems possible. (hopelessley)
Grigori: I saw this gold key chain that Uncle Yuri was holding.
Tatiana: If we could get hold of the keys, Kim? (pauses) We could get out
Noze: (In a yell) O.B.! I know you're listening to me! (facing the audience)
What do you want! I want to get it over what it now! Just kill me O.B.! I had enough of
Noze: I don't care damn it! Look at me! Look at my face! ( pointing to the
his fading scar then pumping his fist.)
Tatiana: Noze, honey sit down and try to relax.
Noze: Don't honey me.
Grigori: Noze: Sit down. Or they will come in and blow our heads off! This
Tatiana: Oh, Grigori, Grigoriio.
( The door of the basement opens and other people are coming in. Those people
are family members and friends of Kim, Noze, Tatiana and Grigori who have been held
hostage by the Uncle Yuri and O.B.. The robots are holding a huge circular table. One
by one the robots tie the people on the table.)
Uncle Yuri: Ha Ha Ha (running back and forth he's holding the shining keys.
O.B. pulls the switch and the table starts rotating.)
Uncle Yuri: It's a torture table everybody! I don't have to explain any more!
Ha ha Ha.
O.B.: You're not tricking me! O.B. Alen. Oh ho oh ho ho ho. You want to
know the real reason why you're here Noze. Stupid boy. I will tell you right now, Noze!
We're trying to create our own unique world, boyee. Where we will rule over you!
(pointing at the people on the table.) oh ho oh ho ho ho (O.B. is drunk. She shakes
when she walks. The Uncle Yuri is holding a liquor bottle and starts to drink. Loud
music is heard from the background.) Then we will create our own society where me
and the Uncle Yuri will rule.
Uncle Yuri: Ha Ha Ha! (laughing at the idea)
O.B.: Oh, ho ho ho! (They start to dance. The robots start to dance.)
The scene is lively.
Kim: We gotta do something.
Grigori: Here's our chance!
Noze: (Noze struggles with the cord that's tied around him.)
(The robots are colliding with each other. Noze manages to untie himself and helps
untie the others. The Uncle Yuri and O.B. are not noticing it.)
Uncle Yuri: Ha Ha Ha!
(O.B. points towards the table and notices they are gone.)
Uncle Yuri: They have escaped!
O.B.: Oh ho ho ho. That's part of the fun. Oh ha ha ha.
Uncle Yuri: They can't get out of here anyway. Ha, ha ha ha.
O.B.: Oh oh oh oh
(Meanwhile on the other side of the stage. Noze, Kim, Grigori, Tatiana and others
are running everywhere trying to get out.)
The stage darkens and quickly the set changes and the people are in different part of the
Kim: Everything has changed. Tatiana do you know exactly where we are.
Tatiana: I don't know, Kim.
Grigori: Uncle Yuri and O.B. has changed the whole house. I have an idea
why don't we break up into two groups.
Tatiana: I'm coming with you Grigoriio.
Grigori: (hesitating Tatiana) I think it's better you stay with your sister.
Noze: Those keys that Uncle Yuri was holding we have to get hold of it!
Damn it! O.B.!
Grigori: Fine, Tatiana. You're in my group.
(Noze and Kim are in one group. Grigori and Tatiana are in another. The two
groups go to their separate ways. Noze, Kim and the others are walking up the stairs
that are on the right side of the stage. The light hits the individuals going up the stage.
Grigori, Tatiana and the other people are walking into the dark curtains.)
Noze: Would you hurry up Kim. Come on!
Kim: Ok, ok!
(Meanwhile, on the other side that is left and up to the hallway, O.B. is leading her
army of robots into the dark hallway. O.B. cannot see the people going up the stairs
because there's a wall.)
Kim: I hear O.B.. (The people panic. They start to go up the stairs to avoid
O.B.: Did I just hear Kim's voice? You think I'm deaf or something
girlowoo? Yeah (O.B. charges up the stairs with the robots. Kim, Noze and other
people are running up the stairs.)
O.B.: Yeahee, Yeah hee hee ya ho. You're making me very angry!
(The Uncle Yuri comes out of the bathroom door. The Uncle Yuri follows O.B.
upstairs to the attic. O.B. kicks the robots because she is angry.)
O.B.: I'm gonna get you Kimbo! (she pumps her fist.)
(Meanwhile O.B.'s strong kick causes a domino effect and the robots fall on the
Uncle Yuri: (a scream) Aghhh!
(O.B. is in the attic.)
O.B.: You Nozee boyee! You bad bad Nozee boy! You thought I won't
Noze: Tell me O.B.. He has brainwashed you. Now we can runaway,
O.B.. You are free O.B..
Kim: Noze! What are you talking about. She's with him! Noze. (looking
directly at him looking betrayed.)
O.B.: You innocent Nozee boy. Sike. I'm with the Uncle Yuri! Stupid!
Kimbo, I saw what you did making a move on my ex-boyfriend.
(Meanwhile the Uncle Yuri has struggled to come up he is sweating and panting.)
Uncle Yuri; Ha ha ha! (with a jump) The attic! You're back where you started. (Holding
Noze: You are insane!
(Uncle Yuri tries to tackle Noze and they are wrestling on the floor. They fight near
the window and the Uncle Yuri drops the keys. Kim snatches it before O.B.. Noze holds
the Uncle Yuri in a tight grip. Kim tries to catch O.B..)
O.B.: Can't catch me girlowoo. I'm faster than you. Ha ha ha. (She runs in
a circle and Kim runs towards her.)
Kim: I'm gonna get you, O.B.!
O.B.: Oh, ho ho ho!(running around)
Noze: Get her quick! (Noze ties the Uncle Yuri with a rope.)
(Noze and Kim chases O.B. around the attic. Noze is standing in front of the door.
Kim and Noze come in both side of the room and they closes in on her.)
O.B.: Yeah! (She turns around very quickly and she jumps out of the open
Aghhh! Noze and Kim are looking out of the window. Meanwhile, a rope falls down
from the top of the stage. The Uncle Yuri starts to untie himself. The Uncle Yuri holds
onto the rope and goes up. He disappears from the stage.)
Kim: Finally, we are free! Noze!
Noze: Come on let's go down.
Kim: He has escaped!
Noze: Damn it! He escaped. How could he.
(They go down the stairs. Kim opens the doors and lets the people out who have
been waiting near the door. Grigori and Tatiana are one of those people who were
waiting. When they are outside there are people outside. There are police and an
ambulance. O.B. is lying on the ground. She is being carried in the ambulance on a
stretcher. Her head is bleeding and her neck seems to be broken.)
Kim: Ah, ha. O.B. we're out .
O.B.: Not for long! girlowoo. (Her voice cracks.)
Noze: O.B.. Now, I know.
O.B.: Know what Nozee. You stupid boyee.
Noze: Your true identity.
Grigori: Where's the Uncle Yuri?
Kim: He has escaped.
Police Officer Spitz: We have searched all through the house. We cannot
(Kim, Noze, Tatiana and Grigori yells.): No!
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