"There's no mascot we can't torture."

The King of the Hill Quotes Page: "Cheer Factor"

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Quotes from "Cheer Factor"
Written by Christy Stratton
Directed by Kyounghee Lim & Boohwan Lim

ANNOUNCER: And Joseph Gribble is sacked for another loss.
DALE: Common name. No relation.

ANNOUNCER: And that's the ballgame. The Longhorns lose their fourth straight. Principal Moss -- who drives a black Altima usually parked in front of the school -- thanks you for attending.

PEGGY (looking through her old yearbook): I really did stay sweet.

JO RITA: The cheerleading squad doesn't get trophies for how good the football team does. We get them for motion and dance, basket tosses, jumps and attitude.

CONNIE: Your mom's a cheerleader?
BOBBY: Wow, I thought that was just more of her big talk. Maybe she really did see Dan Rather at the mall.

CONNIE: It's amazing! I put on this outfit and it's like I'm -- what's the opposite of invisible? I've never had to know.

JO RITA: The last thing our cheerleaders need is to be distracted by the game.

PRINCIPAL MOSS: Sorry I'm late. It took longer than I thought to wipe the eggs off my car.
DALE: Sorry I'm late. It took longer than I thought to egg Moss's car.

PRINCIPAL MOSS: I can't have bored students at an assembly. It's just asking for trouble. I'm gonna cue the band.
PEGGY: Oh, no! No! Not the band!

PEGGY: I have learned something today: people like violence. From now on, we will demoralize the other team by systematically mock-xicuting their mascots.

Hi there, hi there, we won't gloat,
We'll stab the Cougar in the throat!
And when at last the Cougar's dead,
We'll make him see red, red, red, red!

TEACHER: No hats in the lunchroom, Dooley. Take it off.
DOOLEY: I'll die in these horns.

PEGGY: Ladies, we have a problem. Knife play is just not enough anymore. Ideas? Yellow jacket, go!
CONNIE: We could rip open its thorax and stuff it with its own abdomen.
PEGGY: Bobby, how's your death rattle?
BOBBY: (does a death rattle)
PEGGY: Great! Now, who do we play after that?
MERILYNN: The Boswell Bears.
PEGGY: Okay. Now, how do you make a bear suffer?
CONNIE: Tie it up and torture its young!
PEGGY: There's no mascot we can't torture.

PEGGY: Jo Rita, who's next?
JO RITA: The Tornadoes. How are you gonna kill a tornado?
PEGGY: Shoot it.

PAT: ...And after the game, somebody called me "Pat" in the parking lot. It is my name, but he had no way of knowing that!

PEGGY: You were all behind me when it was the Cougars and the Bears and the Mudhawks! It would have been disrespectful of me not to bludgeon the Irishmen!

PRINCIPAL MOSS: You can keep on teaching Spanish, but we have to keep an eye on you in case you decide to go after them too.

EMILY: Sorry, Mrs. Hill, Principal Moss gave me strict orders not to let you into the game.
HANK: What? That's ridiculous!
EMILY: Stay out of this, sir. Our beef's not with you.

JO RITA: Connie, get down here or you can say goodbye to the uniform and a guaranteed seven candid photos in the school yearbook!

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