"I am an onion."

The King of the Hill Quotes Page: "Full Metal Dust Jacket"

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Quotes from "Full Metal Dust Jacket"
Written by Dan McGrath
Directed by Adam Kuhlman

PEGGY: Today we'll be discusing A Tale of Two Cities, a terrific book by that most Dickensian of authors, Charles Dickens.

DOOLEY: You went crazy.

JENNA: Well, a bientôt. Pardon my French.
PEGGY: Oh, este nada. And my Spanish needs no apologies.

HANK: Bobby, why don't you go look in the Adventure section? Anything about a boy with gumption should be fine.

PEGGY: This store is reserved for customers and literati, so why don't you take your apple --
DALE: It's a braeburn.
PEGGY: -- and get out.

PEGGY: In theory, I reject this money. It is only in practice that I accept it.

DALE: The Tuesday special is Saturday night specials. Feel free to browse.

HANK (reading): "The elf-lord Flyfandel knelt upon the bed of dandelions. 'Young wanderer,' quoth he, 'I have woven you a magic breastplate'"-- Ugh! Bobby, television!

JENNA: We've come to place our monthly order for the book club selection, A Dinner of Onions by --
PEGGY: Dora Harmony Wallace, of course. A chronicle of three generations of an American family. I've always wondered why nobody's ever done that before.

PEGGY: Ho yeah! Ankle holsters all around, on the house!

BOOMHAUER: Hey, man, dang ol' father, he symbolizes the past... dang ol' dinner, goin' be the future... so she's talkin' 'bout stuck in the present, man... it's just like dang ol' English class, man.

HANK: "As the ambulance pulled away, Cassie remembered the smell of onions from her grandmother's kitchen." The end. Joe Jack, you awake?
JOE JACK (crying): I've got half a mind to go to Nova Scotia and kick that Benedict's ass.
MR. STRICKLAND: Boy, that Cassie reminds me of someone. Hey, how big did you guys picture her ta-tas?
ENRIQUE: It said she was slender as a willow, so... grapefruits?

MAN (to Hank): So you say it's both efficient and clean-burning? Fascinating!

PEGGY: As Cassie said as the farmhouse burned brightly behind you: "I am an onion." Good day to you!

CLEA: Surely as I am Clea and the Crystal of Kilmarian shines upon my brow, our forces shall rally and vanguish the goblin horde! What say ye, Hindbottom?
BOBBY: Aye, my fell axe thirsts for blood to avenge my father Borak, my swift brother Rigmor Tallenbeard, and --
HANK: Dangit, Bobby, no more elves at the table.

DALE: Excellent grouping, Colonel. Plus those hollow points penetrated Shakespeare all the way into the so-called joyous comedies. "As You Like It?" I like it plenty.

HANK: I'm not much in the Shakespeare department, but I still don't think he deserves to be shot at by those monkeys down there.

DALE: And so, a farewell to A Farewell To Arms.

OX: Can't we at least agree that Mary Elizabeth's baby was her own lighthouse?
TRAVIS: Who ever heard of an illegitimate lighthouse? Dangit, Ox, you're confusin' realism with symbolism again.
OX: I'm about to symbolize my gun to your head.


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