The King of the Hill Quotes Page: "An Officer and a Gentle Boy"
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Quotes from "An Officer and a Gentle Boy"
Written by Dan Sterling
Directed by Gary McCarver
BOBBY: The clock radio smells like my Game Boy, but it tastes like my library card. I wonder if it smells different when it's on?
HANK: I always wanted to go to the Academy.
COTTON: And I wish I could have sent you. Unfortunately you were such a bumbling moron, I couldn't vouch for you.
PEGGY (to Bobby): I'm not sure what this means, but I once heard that when you're stuck in an unpleasant situation, it helps to just lie back and think of England.
COTTON: That's enough, Hank's wife. If you got any more feelin's to express, get in the kitchen and put 'em in a bundt cake!
COTTON: I can hardly waits to see my grandson all toughened up. Do you think you folks could mail me records of his daily beating logs?
COMMANDANT: Colonel Hill, you do realize things have changed since your time here?
COTTON: All right, you can e-mail them to me.
BOBBY: Oh, dang, someone's coming! Lie back and think of England. Hugh Grant. Spice Girls. Paddington!
CRAFTS INSTRUCTOR: On the battlefield, you may find yourself stranded without enough water to survive. But with a sufficient quantity of mud, you will have the ability to create your own bowl, pot, urn, decanter or beaker to collect rain water.
COTTON: What the --? You made a bowl?
HANK: Well, yeah. It's a combat bowl. Bobby made one too.
COTTON: Combat bowl? The only bowl he's supposed to make is from a hollowed-out skull!
HANK: I told you it wasn't easy. You didn't believe me, did you?
COTTON: I guess he was just born a pile of mush.
HANK: Well, I guess you could say that, but maybe mush isn't so bad. You can keep stomping on it, but it's all give. It just stays mush. You can't build it up, but you can't break it down either. In a funny way, mush has the edge.