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Scroggins Crosswired Local News

Breaking News Almost as Weird as Reality

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Headline Index || Editorials || Photo News || Click here for Redneck Version

May-Jun99 | Jul99 | Aug99 | Sep99 | Oct99 | Nov99 | Dec99 | Jan00 | Feb00 | Mar00 | Apr00 | May-Jun00 | Jul-Feb01


DATE

HEADLINE (click the date for news story you want to see)

Feb 16, 2001 Assembly hears gas complaints
Feb 16, 2001 Stench in Macon not blamed on City Council or paper mill
Feb 16, 2001 Navy: having 16 civilians near the controls can be hazardous
Feb 15, 2001 County considers downsizing Bibb employees
Feb 15, 2001 Barnes’ signature begins Bibb School’s battle
Feb 14, 2001 Dudley fights taxi smoking ban, invokes Justice strategy
Feb 13, 2001 Clinton takes snake-oil show to Harlem
Feb 12, 2001 Spacecraft crash-landing on asteroid could boost Georgia economy
Dec. 11, 2000 Gore lawyers appeal U.S. Supreme Court ruling to Judge Judy
Sept 29, 2000 Ellis: City will only buy 'safe' guns and safe cars
Sept 26, 2000 Parents 'freak out' about bibles, cite mythical separation clause, threaten legal action
July11-Sep25 Brief rehab in a mental health facility
July 10, 2000 Clinton uses smartcard to sign E-Signatures Law, quill pen to tickle ladies
June 30, 2000 Rocker rides 7 Train disguised as gay French jewelry salesman
June 29, 2000 Efforts to name Gray Highway the "Groovy Highway" failed
June 28, 2000 Allen says irrational behavior justifies drug tests for Bibb Commission
June 27, 2000 Airport naming rights could create real tongue-twisters
June 26, 2000 Honey production suffers in drought, Clinton economic policy blamed
June 23, 2000 Cicatello refuses Crawford severance offer, suggests other severances
June 22, 2000 Hundreds of thousands heckle Bibb commission for more school funding
June 21, 2000 Court bans God from football games
June 20, 2000 Bibb OKs short-range roads plans through this week
June 19, 2000 School board politely tells county to shove it

Jun8 - Jun16

Crosswired News temporarily disabled by illness in the family
June 7, 2000 Rally planned to support Bibb schools
June 6, 2000 Richardson assignment part of conspiracy to derail GOP landslide
June 5, 2000 DOT chief questions need for rail system and internal combustion engines
June 2, 2000 Macon's water use restrictions threaten budget process
June 1, 2000 Car thief torches wheat field in protest of Al Gore visit
May5 - May 31 Crosswired News editor abducted by aliens - story coming soon...
May 4, 2000 'I Hate You' virus praised by computer experts
May 3, 2000 Governor signs death export tax break, complains of finger cramps
May 3, 2000 INS seizure of Elian Gonzalez disrupts Major League Baseball
May 2, 2000 Public Safety Committee vote prompts the Midnight Ride of Jim Lee
May 1, 2000 Barnes signs law to ensure trial lawyer wealth
May 1, 2000 Sewerage spills prompt language policy at MWA

May-Jun99 | Jul99 | Aug99 | Sep99 | Oct99 | Nov99 | Dec99 | Jan00 | Feb00 | Mar00 | Apr00 | May-Jun00 | Jul00-Feb01


Disclaimer: The accounts, quotes and stories on this page are wholly fictitious and intended as satire and humor. Although real names may be used and all good humor has an element of truth, this stuff ain't real. If you didn't already know these stories were bogus, then you're not too bright. --Steve Scroggins

Write Your Own Macon News Story

These parodies are frequently featured on the NewsTalk940 WMAC morning show with Kenny B and Jami G.

Visit the AM940 web site

To read the "real" news that inspires these stories, read The Macon Telegraph online.

See Ed Grisamore's 9/29/99 column on these parodies.

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