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Scroggins Crosswired Local News
Breaking News Almost as Weird as Reality
Disclaimer
Headline Index || Editorials
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News || Click here for Redneck Version
May-Jun99 | Jul99 | Aug99 | Sep99 | Oct99 | Nov99 | Dec99 | Jan00 | Feb00 | Mar00 | Apr00 | May-Jun00 | Jul-Feb01
DATE |
HEADLINE (click the date for news story you
want to see) |
| Feb 16,
2001 |
Assembly hears
gas complaints |
| Feb 16,
2001 |
Stench in Macon
not blamed on City Council or paper mill |
| Feb 16,
2001 |
Navy: having 16
civilians near the controls can be hazardous |
| Feb 15,
2001 |
County
considers downsizing Bibb employees |
| Feb 15,
2001 |
Barnes’
signature begins Bibb School’s battle |
| Feb 14,
2001 |
Dudley fights taxi
smoking ban, invokes Justice strategy |
| Feb 13,
2001 |
Clinton takes
snake-oil show to Harlem |
| Feb 12,
2001 |
Spacecraft
crash-landing on asteroid could boost Georgia economy
|
| Dec.
11, 2000 |
Gore lawyers
appeal U.S. Supreme Court ruling to Judge Judy |
| Sept 29, 2000 |
Ellis:
City will only buy 'safe' guns and safe cars |
| Sept 26, 2000 |
Parents 'freak out' about
bibles, cite mythical separation clause, threaten legal action |
| July11-Sep25 |
Brief rehab in a mental health
facility |
| July 10, 2000 |
Clinton uses smartcard to sign
E-Signatures Law, quill pen to tickle ladies |
| June 30, 2000 |
Rocker rides 7 Train disguised as
gay French jewelry salesman |
| June 29, 2000 |
Efforts to name Gray Highway the
"Groovy Highway" failed |
| June 28, 2000 |
Allen says irrational behavior
justifies drug tests for Bibb Commission |
| June 27, 2000 |
Airport naming rights could create
real tongue-twisters |
| June 26, 2000 |
Honey production suffers in drought,
Clinton economic policy blamed |
| June 23, 2000 |
Cicatello refuses Crawford severance
offer, suggests other severances |
| June 22, 2000 |
Hundreds of thousands heckle Bibb
commission for more school funding |
| June 21, 2000 |
Court bans God from football games |
| June 20, 2000 |
Bibb OKs short-range roads plans
through this week |
| June 19, 2000 |
School board politely tells county
to shove it |
Jun8 - Jun16 |
Crosswired
News temporarily disabled by illness in the family |
| June 7, 2000 |
Rally planned to support Bibb
schools |
| June 6, 2000 |
Richardson assignment part of
conspiracy to derail GOP landslide |
| June 5, 2000 |
DOT chief questions need for rail
system and internal combustion engines |
| June 2, 2000 |
Macon's water use restrictions
threaten budget process |
| June 1, 2000 |
Car thief torches wheat field in
protest of Al Gore visit |
| May5 - May 31 |
Crosswired
News editor abducted by aliens - story coming soon... |
| May 4, 2000 |
'I Hate You' virus praised by
computer experts |
| May 3, 2000 |
Governor signs death export tax
break, complains of finger cramps |
| May 3, 2000 |
INS seizure of Elian
Gonzalez disrupts Major League Baseball |
| May 2, 2000 |
Public Safety Committee vote prompts
the Midnight Ride of Jim Lee |
| May 1, 2000 |
Barnes signs law to ensure trial
lawyer wealth |
| May 1, 2000 |
Sewerage spills prompt language
policy at MWA |
May-Jun99 | Jul99 | Aug99 | Sep99 | Oct99 | Nov99 | Dec99 | Jan00 | Feb00 | Mar00 | Apr00 | May-Jun00 | Jul00-Feb01
Disclaimer: The accounts, quotes and stories on this page
are wholly fictitious and intended as satire and humor. Although real names may be used
and all good humor has an element of truth, this stuff ain't real. If you didn't already
know these stories were bogus, then you're not too bright. --Steve Scroggins
Write Your Own Macon News Story
These parodies are frequently featured on the NewsTalk940 WMAC morning show with Kenny
B and Jami G.
Visit
the AM940 web site
To read the "real" news that inspires these stories, read The Macon Telegraph online.
See Ed Grisamore's 9/29/99 column on these
parodies.
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Copyright © 1999 - 2001 Steve Scroggins. All rights reserved.
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