The King of the Hill Quotes Page: "To Spank With Love"
Quotes from "To Spank With Love"
JOSEPH: Your mom's as cool as most people's dads.
PEGGY: Quien esta terrando los darts de Nerf?
DOOLEY: You're dead.
PEGGY: "Needs improvement?" I have never had to improve on anything in my whole life!
DOOLEY: I pulled your pants down.
HANK: I'm sure you didn't hurt him. I should know; I got spanked plenty in school.
BOBBY: Dooley pantsed you. That's what he does. And when it happens, you pull up your pants and move on.
MR. DOOLEY: Please, Mrs. Hill, we should apologize to you. I'm sure Stuart Deserved it; we know what a handful he can be.
PRINCIPAL MOSS: Teacher's statement...response from the parents...okay, looks like all our ducks are in a row. Peggy, you're fired.
EMILY: It's over, Mrs. Hill.
COTTON: Hey there, Hank's wife, whatcha cryin' for? Got your monthlies?
JEETER: In my 35 years at Tom Landry Middle School, I spanked thousands of students, shaping their characters and preparing them to die in wars overseas.
DALE: Spanking was wrong then and it's wrong now. I say spare the rod and spoil the child!
BILL: My daddy spanked me every day from when I was nine till I was sixteen, and I turned out okay. (pause) Bastard.
PEGGY: I am going to scare my students, exactly the way President Reagan scared hundreds of millions of Russians with his Star Wars death beam.
BOBBY: Joseph won't even come over to play any more because he says he's having nightmares about that stupid paddle.
BILL: Peggy's feeling powerful, so her body is producing extra amounts of testosterone. I bet if she wanted to, she could grow a mustache! Of course, I don't know why she'd want to.
PEGGY: Do I tell you how to sell propane and propane accessories? Did I criticise you for your big "Spatula Tuesday" fiasco?
PEGGY: This paddle is the only thing standing between the Arlen public school system and complete chaos!
JOSEPH: ...And then she freaked out, and she dropped that paddle right in the middle of the alley. And without that paddle, she looked just like Bobby's mom!
PEGGY: Spain, 1478. The weapon of choice: The mace. It was the beginning of the Spanish Inquisition. Although it was begun with the best of intentions, a number of very nice, innocent people were brutally punished. And without a doubt, the worst thing about the Spanish Inquisition is that nobody ever said they were sorry.
PEGGY: I could use some help preparing the soil. Why don't you spread the mulch?