"The truth is like sunlight. People used to think it was good for you."

The King of the Hill Quotes Page: "I Remember Mono"

Click here to return to the Main Quotes Page


Quotes from "I Remember Mono"
Written by Paul Lieberstein
Directed by Wes Archer

HANK: Bobby, if you give a Valentine to a sixth-grade boy, girls are gonna think you're sensitive. And something like that can follow you the rest of your life.

LUANNE: Since Buckley said he's going to forget Valentine's Day again I've finally made myself realize that to love yourself, that's the greatest love of all. Isn't that right, Aunt Peggy?
PEGGY: No.
HANK: No. That's not really true at all, in fact.
LUANNE: Oh.

MADDY: But Peggy, if Hank discovers that you cannot even bake, it is all over.
YOUNG PEGGY: You think I can't see that?
MADDY: Do not say "can't." You will not use contractions in this house.

LUANNE: Wow, so I guess what they say is true. There is somebody out there for everybody.
HANK: Huh? No, I don't think that follows at all, Luanne.
PEGGY: Nope. Not for everybody. Uh-uh.
LUANNE: Oh.

HANK: The old high school, huh? Boy, I haven't been there since -- let's see, the season ended, what, two months? -- yep, two months ago.

(From Hank's permanent record)
- Fourth grade: Kicked out of chorus for refusing to sing "Where Have All the Flowers Gone?"
- Ninth grade: Told debate team to "shut the hell up."

DALE: Hey, Hank, did you ever wonder what it'd be like to drink beer standing over there?
HANK: Curiosity killed the cat, Dale.

NANCY: The truth is like sunlight. People used to think it was good for you.

KERRI STRUG: It's compulsory that you be my Valentine.

AMY: Who are you?
PEGGY: I am a lot of things. I am a mother, I am a teacher, and I am a wife with some questions that desperately need to be answered. They call me Peggy Hill.

PEGGY: Hank, I can forgive the kissing. I can even forgive the lying. But there's one thing I cannot forgive. Our marriage was built on a wonderful little romantic story. Hank, in my opinion, it was the second greatest story ever told. But now -- now we have no story. All we have is a big side of beef and three broken ribs. You break it, you buy it. That's Pink and White for you.

DALE: You gotta do something to sweep her off those big feet, Hank. Toss a little woo at her, see what sticks.
HANK: I don't know. I used up all my good material winning Peggy over the first time.
BOOMHAUER: Tell you what, put a little whipped cream on that ol' plastic wrap.
DALE: Maybe you can steal something from a movie, like Lethal Weapon. Man, those two guys loved each other.
BILL: Yeah, I'll tell you something I saw in a movie once. See, this pig got loose in this couple's house, and they chased it around until they fell on top of each other. And they were laughing, and... giggling, and... (starts to cry) loving...

PEGGY: If your lies were dollars, I would have a hundred thousand dollars by now, and I would live off the interest, Hank. I'd still have to keep my job, but things would be a lot easier.

DOOLEY: Your grandmother loves you.

LUANNE: Am I supposed to kill this pig?


Click here to return to the Main Quotes Page

1